Lost in Translation
by Batsaboutbats
Summary: Gru is acting out of character. Does Kairo have anything to worry about? (Kairo is the property of pocket-size-super-villain) (NOTE: I did my best to research different words in Arabic. I used the phonetic pronunciation of Arabic rather than the written script. I do not claim this to be 100% accurate in any way).


The small family ate quietly as tension filled the air. "Where's Gru..?" asked Agnes, Gru's youngest daughter, finally breaking the silence. Margo, the eldest, piped up "I keep hearing him on the phone upstairs in his office." Picking at her food, Edith, the middle child said quietly "and I keep seeing him look secretly around and write things down on paper he stuffs in his pockets..."

Kairo listened to the girls observations with a sinking heart. She's noticed the dark circles under his eyes, the late hours he gets home...the nights he never even comes to bed. She's tried questioning him, but he just kept blowing her off and changing the subject, sometimes getting very defensive. Something wasn't right and Kairo was too afraid to think about it. Finally, the conversation got to her. "Girls! Enough! Finish your dinner, do the rest of your homework then you can choose a book before bed." After Kairo cleaned up the kitchen, she made sure the girls were doing their work and decided to visit the only person Gru has known the longest: Dr. Nefario.

Down she went to the lab, knocking on the inner door nervously. Kairo knew he didn't like many visitors there and certainly not at night. She knew he only tolerated her because she was in charge of doing Gru's vast collection of antiquities, thus enabling him to concentrate all of his time and energy on inventing. "It opens." Came the Scientists' tired reply. Kairo pushed open the door and stood in the doorway, looking slightly shaken and unable to say a word. With an irritated sigh, Dr. Nefario barked "Girl, don't dawdle! State your business or leave! Can't you see I'm busy?!" His back was turned to her, but she could see all, he was doing, was drying some teacups. Kairo regretted ever coming down here and in a shaky voice, replied "G-Gru..."

"Yes? What about him...?" Nefario grumped. Suddenly his back stiffened and he turned suddenly around. "'Es gone off again, 'asent 'e? Bloody 'ell." All of a sudden Dr. Nefario's demeanor changed and as he shuffled over to her he reached out to her and patted her on the arm "I'm sorry love. I've sent minions after 'im in th' past, but you know them...easl'y distracted." He looked at her sadly.

Kairo looked at the old man confused. "What do you mean?" Dr. Nefario sat on a lab stool and patted the one next to him. "I think you need to hear something I've been considering." As Kairo sat down, Nefario sighed and questioned her "What do you know?" Kairo paused and then took a deep breath "Gru is acting strangely, he rarely comes to bed, goes out and comes in late...the girls say they've heard him talking on the phone in his office, and they've seen him writing letters and hiding them..." Nefario rubbed her back then sadly got off the stool pacing to the table and turning on his electric kettle "I was afraid o' tha'...Kairo, I regret to inform you that Gru...is seeing someone behind your back." Kairo stared at the old scientists' back in shock {Nefario thinks Gru is...cheating on me...?} Nefario turned back around with two teacups full of steeping tea "Tea?" But he was speaking to an empty space. Kairo was gone.

Upon hearing Nefario's theory, Kairo fled to their room. She opened the door and belatedly remembered the girls. Spinning on her heel, Kairo shut the door hastily and headed for the girls room, hoping to see Gru there. When she got there, her heart dropped when she saw the girls very much alone, Margo making sure the two younger ones were already in their pajamas and choosing a book. "Thank you, Margo, I'm sorry I'm late, now, what did you pick?" She was dismayed when they had chosen 'One Big Unicorn' {just what I need, something to remind me of him}, but she auto-piloted through with just a slight quiver in her voice at the end. Hastily she tucked them in and gave them goodnight kisses before heading back to their room. No, his room. While she was reading to the girls, Kairo decided to move out of their room. She called down to the lab and asked for her most trusted and favorite minions to help her move out.

Quietly they worked until everything was packed and moved back into her tiny room she first started out in. It seemed even smaller with so much stuff crammed into it. She bade the minions goodnight and gave each two hugs and kisses each before snuggling in and crying herself to sleep.

Gru stumbled in the door, being late as usual as he had been most nights for the past month or so. He sighed heavily as he went and looked in on the girls and then went past his and Kairos room and headed for his office. He didn't want to bother Kairo since he knew she was a light sleeper. { I hope all dis vill be worth eet} and as he settled into his office, he heaved a heavy black bag on his desk. Tiredly, he drug out what's been keeping him busy so much lately: "Pimsleur's Guide to Conversational Arabic". He brought over his gPod and pushed play "Kayfa Haaluka?" He repeated quietly each word and phrase that the recording told him to. He worked long into the night before falling asleep at his desk like he has so many nights before.

With puffy eyes, Kairo emerged from her tiny space to make the girls breakfast before work. Halfway through preparing it, Gru stumbled in and kissed Kairo on the back of her neck, barely noticing her shrinking from his touch. His hard work was almost done, and he couldn't wait to share it with Kairo. The look on her face when he surprises her with knowing Arabic will be priceless. He chuckled to himself and seeing as Kairo was busy at the stove, he hastily wrote down something on a piece of paper from his pocket. Noticing she was turning around, Gru stuffed it into his pocket, the verse was almost perfect. "Why do you always do that?" spit out Kairo bitterly. The venom in her voice was not lost on Gru, who blinked at her in surprise "Vhat?" Kairo sneered, "You are hiding something and I will find out what it is." Gru looked at her in a stupor as Kairo slammed the plates of food on the table and called for the girls to come down and have breakfast. "**You** can do the dishes for once" snapped Kairo, pushing her way through the kitchen door. Gru sat open mouthed at Kairos outburst. He knew he'd been shirking his duties as a father and lover lately, but it was important to him that he did this. Their second anniversary was coming up and he thought this was a perfect surprise. He felt numb and confused at Kairos actions as he saw the girls off to school and went back to his office for his spare set of clothes and a quick shower. {best not run een tu her vhen she ees dis pissed}. He was still not aware that she had moved out of their room.

The anger Kairo felt in the kitchen disappeared as she stormed to her room and threw herself on the bed, instantly sobbing. "Why?!" Kairo asked no one in particular, the anguish evident in her voice. Soon, she called the same minions that helped her move and told them of her plans.

Gru grabbed his jacket and scarf off of the hook in the foyer and put them on. Seeing the jackets of his family brought tears to the old ex-villains eyes. Longingly he thought of Kairo, how long it's been since they kissed, let alone just been in each other's presence to enjoy it. {Tonight ees de last night, and tomorrow night ees all about making eet up tu dem and surprising Kairo}. With determination, he headed out and got into his vehicle and left. He never saw the small vehicle come out from behind a bunch of parked cars.

Carefully Kairo followed Gru, making sure she wasn't spotted. She questioned Steve when she lost sight of Gru and followed where the GPS tracking screen was leading them. Kevin and Stuart were both slapping at each other over the radio but stopped once they arrived at their destination. Once they parked they noticed Gru was already inside of the private residence. Kairos heart sank lower as she got out of the car, telling the minions to stay. Instead of knocking on the door like she had first planned, she went to the back of the house to see if she could see through the windows. As she snuck around the side she saw an open window and heard Grus voice: "Now, vhere deed ve leave off?" His voice sounded...happy and breathless. {What?!} "I love you," said a woman's voice. That did it. That was the proof she needed. Heartbroken, Kairo stifled a scream of grief before tearing her way back to her car. She never heard Grus' reply "Uhibuk...Kairo".

When Kairo got home, she packed the barest of essentials, leaving mostly everything Gru had ever given her behind. Next she wrote a farewell letter to the girls and Gru, leaving it on the kitchen table, unable and unwilling to face them. Calling a taxi, she sat on the stoop in front of the house waiting for it, angry tears streaming down her face. She had decided to go to the Egyptian Embassy downtown, surely they would offer her sanctuary until she could get a flight back to Egypt. It was hard to face the prospect of leaving. This has been her home for over two years now…but she heard Gru and that woman. He's with her now.

As the taxi pulled up, Gru did too with the girls inside. He stepped out of the vehicle, clearly confused and walked towards Kairo "Vhat ees going on here? Vhere are yu going?" As the taxi driver loaded her small battered suitcase, Kairo replied coldly "What do you care? Go back to that woman you have been with!" Gru's face drained of color and he wobbled "Y-yu…followed me? Why?" Kairo looked at him with scorn "You have been distant and acting strangely, what other choice did I have? I told you I would find out, and I found you and another woman together. You even went to her house!" The girls were still inside the vehicle and they were crying, not knowing the full extent of what was going on. Kairo stepped into the taxi, calling over the roof. "Goodbye Gru. Forever. I was hoping to be gone before you came back but seeing as you are here I have one thing left to say to you: Bouse tize, nayaak ghbar!" (Kiss my ass fucker!)" Unbeknownst to Kairo, Gru knew exactly what she said, thankful that the girls couldn't understand her. He fell to his knees and called out to Kairo "Wait! Yu're wrong! I'll prove it!" Kairo's broken heart wanted her to flee, but she followed her gut feeling and stayed. She beckoned to the taxi driver to wait just a moment. {Fine, let's see what lies he comes up with}. Going around the back of the taxi and stopping on the sidewalk, she crossed her arms in impatience, her best scowl set in place.

Gru sighed a huge sigh of relief {Good, now I can show her. Eet's not de candlelight dinner I had planned to surprise her vith, but eet's now or never. Hopefully eet's enough.} Still kneeling in a patch of dirt and a bit of Kyle's feces, Gru hesitantly recited the simple verse. "Uhibuk Kairo, aaadeem kanz min qalb. Bistitnaa anta, ana iftiqad." (I love you Kairo, great treasure of my heart. Without you I am lost.) Upon hearing Gru speak to her in Arabic, Kairo's hands flew to her mouth and fat tears burst from her eyes. "You learned Arabic? For me?" She ran to him and hugged him close "I'm sorry I doubted you, but you have been so secretive!" Grunting, Gru stood, enveloping Kairo with a huge hug, kissing the top of her head "I wanted eet tu be a surprise tomorrow night…I'm sorry I kept eet from yu." Kairo looked at Gru with watery eyes and a lopsided smile. Playfully she hit him on the arm "Don't do it again, ok? Next time, ask me to teach you!"


End file.
